I’m half-way through the war and I’m happy to report that there’s only been a limited amount of injuries and no casualties. One can only hope that the post-traumatic stress of the battles won’t cause excessive psychological damage in the long run.
The war I’m referring to is trying to get my spawn to migrate from kids to teenagers. And I have two. Don’t feel sorry for me, just send money. And alcohol.
Seriously though, thus far they haven’t turned into the raging hormonal freaks so many other parents warned us about. They’re merely two hormonal, moderately erratic, older versions of the loving kids that used to live in our house. Two people trying to understand who they are, where they fit in and how to cope with life. We pray that this journey of discovery ends in complete acceptance and unconditional self-love.
We’re blessed to have two of the most wonderful, unique and amazing people call us Mom and Dad.
Dude is simply awesome with the warmest personality and I’m happy to report that we share the same sense of humour. He still thinks it’s cool to go to gym with Dad.
Princess is absolutely stunning with a mind-blowing sense of responsibility and I’m happy to report that we share a taste in music. She still thinks Dad is her superhero.
All three of us love Wife more than life itself and we’ll be the first to admit that our success at being human is because of her.
I felt it important to provide a status report for all the parents who still have to travel the treacherous road of raising teens. First off, you only need unlimited WiFi, loads of patience, the ability to say no (and stick with it) and a very good sense of humour. The good news is that parenting teenagers is very similar to parenting toddlers, so that means you’re all qualified.
It’s also the bad news.
- They’re always hungry and will whine until they get fed. Fast food still works best, even if it doesn’t come with a toy.
- You still have to feed them even though they consider themselves not to be kids anymore.
- You still have to dress them, especially if they want to go out in public with you.
- You still have to clean up after them or offer money and they might do it themselves.
- You still have to remind them about the importance of taking a bath, especially on a Saturday.
- They still won’t listen to everything you say, mainly because they’re stuck with headphones most of the time. (They normally react very quickly when you throw something at them.)
- You still have to manage awkward mood swings and irrational outburst of emotion, especially when you use the demon word “No”.
- You still have to decipher their ability to communicate, as they’re using words you wouldn’t understand, irrespective of how hip you might think you are.
- You still have weird aromas wafting from their rooms, mainly composed of creams, cologne, lunch boxes and farts.
- You still have to listen to their music, which fortunately doesn’t include that annoying, frigging Barney-song.