Ten reasons why parenting teens and parenting toddlers are exactly the same thing.

I’m half-way through the war and I’m happy to report that there’s only been a limited amount of injuries and no casualties.  One can only hope that the post-traumatic stress of the battles won’t cause excessive psychological damage in the long run.

The war I’m referring to is trying to get my spawn to migrate from kids to teenagers.  And I have two.  Don’t feel sorry for me, just send money.  And alcohol.

Seriously though, thus far they haven’t turned into the raging hormonal freaks so many other parents warned us about.  They’re merely two hormonal, moderately erratic, older versions of the loving kids that used to live in our house.  Two people trying to understand who they are, where they fit in and how to cope with life.  We pray that this journey of discovery ends in complete acceptance and unconditional self-love.

We’re blessed to have two of the most wonderful, unique and amazing people call us Mom and Dad.

Dude is simply awesome with the warmest personality and I’m happy to report that we share the same sense of humour. He still thinks it’s cool to go to gym with Dad.

Princess is absolutely stunning with a mind-blowing sense of responsibility and I’m happy to report that we share a taste in music.  She still thinks Dad is her superhero.

All three of us love Wife more than life itself and we’ll be the first to admit that our success at being human is because of her.

I felt it important to provide a status report for all the parents who still have to travel the treacherous road of raising teens. First off, you only need unlimited WiFi, loads of patience, the ability to say no (and stick with it) and a very good sense of humour.  The good news is that parenting teenagers is very similar to parenting toddlers, so that means you’re all qualified.

It’s also the bad news.

  1. They’re always hungry and will whine until they get fed. Fast food still works best, even if it doesn’t come with a toy.
  2. You still have to feed them even though they consider themselves not to be kids anymore.
  3. You still have to dress them, especially if they want to go out in public with you.
  4. You still have to clean up after them or offer money and they might do it themselves.
  5. You still have to remind them about the importance of taking a bath, especially on a Saturday.
  6. They still won’t listen to everything you say, mainly because they’re stuck with headphones most of the time.  (They normally react very quickly when you throw something at them.)
  7. You still have to manage awkward mood swings and irrational outburst of emotion, especially when you use the demon word “No”.
  8. You still have to decipher their ability to communicate, as they’re using words you wouldn’t understand, irrespective of how hip you might think you are.
  9. You still have weird aromas wafting from their rooms, mainly composed of creams, cologne, lunch boxes and farts.
  10. You still have to listen to their music, which fortunately doesn’t include that annoying, frigging Barney-song.
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69 thoughts on “Ten reasons why parenting teens and parenting toddlers are exactly the same thing.

  1. Pingback: Shunday Share | All In A Dad's Work

  2. So true!!!! I always say, the toddler years are just a precursor to what one can expect during the teen years. Yes, and the feeding issues explode exponentially. I have two sons, both bodybuilders, who eat 6 times a day. My grocery bill presently is about $2000/month. AARGH!!!! Luckily they can cook for themselves, but really enjoy home-cooked meals at dinner. And we have to buy all free-range, non-GMO, antibiotic free meat – EEK! But the good thing is, our kids, still hang out at home, their friends come over and actually enjoy spending time with all of us. So, the teen years are not always fraught with drama, most of it is quite pleasant. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Bad news – the farting never stops.

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  3. Totally!!! I Always say a teenager is just a toddler in an adults body, I am currently parenting a 14 year old and a 10 month old the teenager is harder ! Good post

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m currently at the lower end of the spectrum, I have 2 boys age 21 months and six, although I swear my six year old has hit puberty already! I “ruin” his life daily and if he mutters the word “shit” under his breathe one more time I may loose my mind! The doors in this house are coming off the hinges from the amount of slamming he does on his way up the stairs!
    thanks for a good read and a giggle, I’ll look forward to having a couple of testosterone filled teenagers :-/

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  5. Hilarious. Right down my alley (which is filled with Their stinky socks and bowls of dried up weetbix.) Mine are both boys, now 19 and 17. This is where religion comes into it’s own. Particularly as I’m teaching the 2nd one to drive.
    I’m a new follower! Loved your post, I’m going to check out your others. You might get a laugh out of mine – ‘The Learner Driver Exasperation’.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I had to chuckle reading your post because even though I’m not a mother of teenagers yet, my oldest is 9, I know I’m heading that way so I had to make a pit stop at your post to read what was in store for me. haha! Well I’m glad to know that I’m qualified because even right now my children act like they are 16 all the way down to my 3 year old daughter. Thank you for posting!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. This made me smile. We have 4 kids and our youngest is 17. We can see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. Your essay reminds me of something a middle school teacher told me about teenagers. He compared them to cats, and told me not to worry. Once adolescence was over, my child would revert back to being a loving, loyal dog who was happy to see me and wanted to please me.

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