The inspiration for this post is derived from the ultra-realistic and touching human drama on display in Fast and Furious 6. It was intriguing to see how little character development can be shoved into two hours of moving images. I’m so grateful for Hollywood finally moving away from stereotyping black people, woman and Germans.
Then there is the Rock’s arms, which should get it’s own character poster, as it has more screen time than Paul Walker. The veins of his arms look more like a special effect. I suppose the budget for this movie was a little tight, hence his shirt being seven sizes too small. Chill off the juice, dude, all I’m saying.
Then the car chases. Oh my. Driving at ridiculous speeds, then crashing, spinning, flipping, only having the driver walking away unscaved. Is this the A-Team? Amazing stuff. The Avengers should take note, New York doesn’t need them. There was even a cameo from Superman (without costume) when he dives from a moving vehicle across a bridge, catches a girl mid-fall and then land on the windscreen of another car. All without flinching. Must be said that Vin Diesel stopped flinching, once he opened his eyes in the first scene.
I really enjoy Superhero movies, I just didn’t realise this was going to be one of them. The ridiculousness of the final action set piece, made the destruction of Metropolis looked like a kid’s party.
And who can forget the speeding tank! And this was not a typo, I did say: Speeding. Tank. As in artillery vehicle causing mayhem on a highway. Was anyone else a little bit concerned for the countless deaths, resulting from the Tank wiping out cars?
In the end, we should be grateful that they kept everything realistic and grounded in the laws of physics.
There was a scene between the villain, aka the-guy-who-will-die-at-the-end and the hero, aka the-guy-who-will-get-the-girl-even though-he-has-one-already. (Or by his other name the-guy-who-doesn’t-own-a-shirt-with-sleeves.) Girl #2 seemed pretty happy to accept the fact that she’s dumped and replaced by girl #3, who use to be girl #1, and has no idea why she’s even in the movie. Just showing how easy and shallow woman are NOT. Further evidence of non-female behaviour, would be the gyrating girls in skimpy outfits in Londen and a mother who entices her husband to go on a deadly mission, with baby in hand.
But let me get back to that exchange of two really bad actors. In this scene the villain reveals the extend of his depth, when he recalls a conversation with his little brother. He was told that every man needs to live by a code. For all men are shallow, one-dimensional and need a reason to do stupid things. (A theory further supported by a warning at the end, that people should not try and replicate the stunts shown during the movie. And I was really disappointed about this, as I ran out of things to do with my cargo plane and titanium strong cables, that’s lying in the backyard. Poor me)
I wouldn’t want anyone to have to sit through the same shit I did, so I’ll briefly explain THE CODE. As per movie, it implies a fundamental, inherent, centred motivation for doing the dumb-ass crazy stuff they do on a daily basis. It’s suppose to define, or at least provide motivation for the choices the characters make.
In the context of the film the code for the Villain is precision, whilst ole Vin shares loyalty. And this is where my mind moved to a better place and stayed there for at least twenty minutes, without losing the plot of the movie. It’s not really saying a lot, as there were no real plot to begin with. This cinematic experience was just an excuse to see fast cars, superhero stunts, skimpy girls and two woman beating the crap out of each other. Pretty awesome.
Indulge me for a second. What is my code? Do I have this one basic, core value that drives my behaviour. I sure hope not. I would hope that my decisions are based on a little bit more than one damn thing.
However, for the sake of posting and having something to write about today, let’s assume there is one core value that reign supreme amongst the rest. The one value that rules them all. One destined to become the valedictorian of your conceptual thoughts. Which one would that be?
I’m obviously revealing mine, otherwise this post would be as senseless as this movie. Loyalty. Just like Vin Diesel. Probably because I resemble him physically. You know; big, bald and brawny.
Seriously, we all know I have a fantastic family, so I’m allowed to love them a lot. And my friends are the envy of other people, so I really don’t mind them that much either. I know I would do anything to defend, protect, inspire, support and help them. Well, except for jumping from a speeding car. And I probably won’t take on a military tank. When bullets start flying, I’m outta here. And I’m useless in a fight. But other than these things, I’ll do anything for them. I’m that loyal.
Like a dog. A big, fluffy, cuddly, playful, happy, tail-wagging dog.
PS – Why did I finish the movie? Not sure, I’m a guy… Why not?