Determining if You Have Small Children: A Handy Checklist

I just had to do it, reblog this post. It’s like stealing a parking at a busy mall when your in a serious hurry, from the lady on her phone who battles with the steering wheel… I know, I know.
But this is one of the funniest things I’ve read all week, and that includes my own stuff… drivingmisty, you made my day!!

is this thing on?

Because sometimes, we can’t be sure if we produced offspring, or if it’s all just been a weird, fucked up dream.

1. Have you ever shared your bed with a person who is small in stature, is difficult to understand, and is NOT an Italian from New Jersey?

1b. If you answered YES to Question 1, did you roll over in the middle of the night and find yourself in a puddle of urine that was not your own?

2. Have you ever inexplicably found any of the following in your purse/pockets/briefcase: a Happy Meal toy, a partially eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich, any small item you thought you had lost several months ago, a pair of tiny underpants featuring cartoon characters, boogers you are certain did not come from you, or a crayon drawing?

2b. If you have found a pair of tiny underpants, did you instinctively sniff…

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